Wednesday is Valentine's Day.
My five year old has diligently written out 25 Valentines to everyone in her class. She also wrote one for her teacher and her father and I.
She will likely receive 24 Valentines as is right in Kindergarten land.
But when does it stop being right?
Look at this school which tells all the girls (and the boys we assume, but it is unclear) that they have to say yes if asked to dance. They must dance with the person who asked them. This bothers me. Even in middle school if I had been asked to dance by some of my classmates, it would have been to somehow humiliate me on the dance floor. Should I have given the mean girls Valentines?
Are the kids still supposed to hand out Valentines to everyone? At what age do we just say, you do what you want. At what age do we tell them that yeah, Valentine's is kind of a crock. I mean if you're with someone who only tells you they love you on Valentine's day is that a good thing?
At the high school where D teaches, the kids have singing telegrams and carnations delivered, similar to my own high school experience. I remember well the Valentine's day when all of my friends had something and I had had nothing. I remember the Valentine's Day when I got a carnation from "your secret friend." To this day, I don't know who sent it, but it made my day.
As much as we want our children to be a part of things and to fit in sometimes they will be excluded. It's our job, as parents and people who help raise these kids to cushion the blow--not make it so the blow never lands.
As for us now, Valentine's Day means that I will make a yummy dinner. Then on the day after Valentine's Day my husband will get chocolate that is on sale.
That's love.
My son's school is also celebrating valentine's day by exchanging cards to every kid in the class. I don't know how long he will do this for the whole class. He is 2nd grade now. We never celebrated this day when we were young in our part of the world. It was much easier that way. :)
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