Here is my summary of current events:
Cincinnati gorilla
You weren't there. Kids get away quicker than you think. Stop berating the mother.
Bernie Sanders
I appreciate you staying in until the very end. That being said, the situation is no more rigged against you than it was against Hillary in 2008. Saying it is makes you look like a child. Condoning the violence and horrific harassment in Nevada lost you my vote. If you won't protect your democratic rival's rights, how do I know you will protect mine?
Hillary Clinton
I don't give a flying fig about your emails. Turn the conversation to why the state department doesn't have better security than my gmail account.
Donald Trump
Shut up. Just shut up.
Anything else?
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